When I Met An Incomplete Soul

In the process of growing older, I learnt to suppress my wishes deep inside my heart but even today I can’t deny myself that the most beautiful wish I had was to have someone in my life who’s afraid to lose me. I never imagined that this was going to be fulfilled in such a surprising way, it came out to be a girl who told me how important I was for her.

Two years ago, we students from different places in India, landed in a very different world of competition. With dreams in our eyes, we stepped in. We didn’t know if it was going to change our destiny forever. I still ask, where did we go wrong? 

It was dark. Amidst the darkness, came she, an introvert from the most modern city of India and not at all so modern and interesting. We just had some required conversation. One day when I had nothing to do I kept staring at objects around me and then at her, Oh! I noticed her natural beauty for the first time and as I always do, I gave her a complement. She reacted in a very awkward way she was actually very shy and she said, ‘nobody ever gave such complements to me, though I had so many friends’.

People always made fun of her weight​ but she behaved as if she wasn’t aware of what they said. I always noticed her from another corner, I thought why isn’t she reacting though I could figure out she was really hurt but the best part about her was, she never did anything to impress someone neither she chose to lose her extra belly fat nor she was planning to get a makeover in the upcoming years.

It was six months already, everbody complained about the competition, lack of time and grades. No matter how happy the person seems to be we all knew that everybody was depressed and tired of running in this race. Stress was now a regular thing, to let go of this we both sat in a corner and talked about useless topics…so you see this was where the trouble began we started getting lower ranks and the saddest part was it wasn’t affecting us anymore or maybe we were hiding it. She once told me about her last school and in the flow she told me how she had a crush on her childhood best friend with whom she used to go almost everywhere, share anything and talk about nothing. She spent ten beautiful years with him and was dying to propose him but that one day, like her worst nightmare, came a girl who her best friend proposed. She was mocked for having feelings for him. Her best friend made her feel rejected and so worthless that these memories left a big scar on her forever. So you see, this was the reason why she never showed​ interest in any guy around. It made her so negative that she never talked positive about anybody and the worst part was back bitching. Her temper was really worst, she bad mouthed everybody who tried to mess with her even if he/she was  actually trying to be friendly. Her mom said to me that only you can control her and that’s when a girl like me who never wanted​ friendship vibes around herself decided to step in. We used to scold each other to study. She used to bring lunch for me, we ate ice creams​ everyday after school, we went on shopping together and while returning we used to drink coke and behave like we’re not in senses. She was so crazy that one night in excitement she went to a boys hostel and started shouting a classmate’s name who lived there​. Those nights were beautiful, we made memories. So this is how a year passed.

Now in the beginning of this new year something unusual happened and thank God it happened she started talking to everyone smilingly. She made new friends and meanwhile there was another character entering in her life. I was already familiar with this guy but she actually hated him for no reason. They started talking for hours on phone and somewhere she was developing a different feeling for him about which she was herself not aware. The lunch breaks, when we talked nonsense, now was reserved only for one topic- ‘He’. I could feel this sudden change in the direction of the air. It was a strange combination, a girl who had a lot to say, who repeated her jokes and a boy who could truly understand her. They were so comfortable in sharing something with each other which they never shared with anybody else before. I thought finally it’s time to turn my head back and move in a direction I came from because there was someone to care for her whom I trusted. My work was now over. I came to her life because I knew she was a tree in search of water, she had wings which was needed to be ignited. It would’ve been great if that boy would have said yes to this love story but he just wanted to be her best friend because according to him friendship was the only relation which could bind them together when circumstances set them apart. 

And I as a character who had to leave one day happily turned back. Her nights after then never made her feel so weak.

This was how she learnt three important lessons about life that brought her to a place from where she would never like to go back…never in the past…never again. 

Happy Birthday Riti❤

  • Believe in love no matter how hard it kicks you. Love will find a way.
  • Smile at everybody around even if they’re bad with you. You don’t know when you’ll melt a soul.
  • Learn to hug goodbyes, it’s beautiful.

Your Turn Now :)

Hello people, It’s​ been another big year on WordPress and this time I want to make it special. I’ve my birthday just after 10 days so I’d like my readers to comment​ a topic on which they want me to write on this big day of mine. The aim is to help all those who need counseling or suggestions and if you want to talk to me personally about your problems, please mail me your topic at ashankaraj@gmail.com it will be private.

Warm regards ❤

Vibrate Higher- Let The Dead Leaves Drop

Negativity can only affect you if you are on the same frequency. The way is long and the time is less if you start kicking all the stones that comes your way you’ll never reach the destination for which you’re sacrificing your comfort zone. We feel helpless when we step out and meet fake people whose only intention is to torture us mentally and in this world of seven billion people almost half of them are monsters with friendly faces but that doesn’t mean that everyday you’ve to yell at your destiny and lose everything that you have. Growing up doesn’t mean growing old it means learning from the worst situations and facing it. The environment around us is not created by the people living around us it’s created when we let go of people, thoughts and situations that poison our well being. Commit choices that will help you release the great expression of your unique purpose. It’s okay if you’ve been traveling​ in the wrong direction my dear, you can always turn around. Happiness is defined by the choices we make. Let me tell you my personal experience, I wrote my last post, “A limb that won’t fall from the family tree” when I was really hurt emotionally. I was that kinda girl who gets badly affected from the negative vibes. I had a serious fight with my roommate and I was already​ pressurised because of my studies. The time was against me and I was being tortured. Whenever I found a solution they created problems but then I decided that I won’t react. Let them do whatever they want. They said filthy words about me but I kept quiet and remember quiet is not always weak. I chose not to fight with those who don’t even matter because my temper is really bad when I start replying I become the teller of unfortunate truths but this time I didn’t disrespect or humiliate them for whatever they did. I treated them like the stones in my beautiful way and I didn’t explain anything to anyone because when you’re right you just don’t need to exaggerate it. When you don’t give a damn nobody else can make you weak, you just be good to everyone because your behavior says all about you and their behavior says enough about them. I’m sharing this because I’m at peace in my present and I’ve learnt that in the end, nobody matters except the dreams left unfulfilled. 

A Limb That Won’t Fall From The Family Tree

I can’t always be happy and life is not only about happiness. Sometimes or maybe everytime I feel depressed but that doesn’t mean that I need someone’s help. They don’t need to be there with me just because I was there with them during their bad times. I need to accept that I’m a stone now and I can’t smile…I really can’t and that’s perfectly okay. I’ve to tell myself that baby, this is life… accept it or quit. I always have an option and there’s nothing wrong if I’ve decided something for me. People might feel bad for me after I leave but it’s a bitter truth that one day they’ll move on..even my mom will move on..and exactly! that’s life. I don’t want to compare my pain with someone who’s going through even worst situations or someone who’s ​finally successful what I know is I want to scream I want to yell I want to break myself in tears but I end up inhaling it all inside and trust me it kills.. depression kills. I used to smile and I really looked beautiful but I can’t go back because it never gets better. And there’s so much more to say but I’ve to stop here because sometimes when we’re in darkness we think we have been buried but actually we have been planned. Why would I harm myself or hurt my loved ones just because some people made it difficult for me to breathe. No, I would not! There are many wonderful gifts in life which I haven’t yet received but I’m on the way and why would​ I quit early when I don’t know what’s next. Be it a movie or a game it can’t be interesting without monsters and so is life we just have to feel the thrill. Today a girl in my city committed suicide everybody criticised her and nobody tried to know the reason. I can’t say if she was weak or she had no other option without knowing anything about her but I would definitely say that the people who disturb you mentally are the one who would laugh at you when you quit. Just don’t let that happen. Live❤ 

Women Like You Drown Oceans


Roses are not always red
Violets aren’t exactly blue.

We live in a world where pretty means beautiful, it means lovable, it means smart and sometimes it means blessed. An average looking girl is like she’s punished by God. We’ve so many fairness cream I don’t know why fairness is eye-candy and black means you’ve a tough life. Our society is so much concerned about beauty that when an acid attack victim Laxmi Agarwal decided to live they suggested her to commit suicide because no one would marry her and she’s a curse on her family. She got no job because the employees were scared of her face. I pity them for they’re cursed with their own imagination. We share those posts which says we should respect a girl and give her a chance to fly but still we can’t love someone who was raped. We don’t blame those rapist and attackers, we blame the girl. We don’t care about her career we care about her marriage. I mean why the hell is it mandatory for her to start a family in a country with the highest population. In our movies, an actress is just for making the scenes look attractive though she has the ability to do more than that and Gal Gadot proved it to everyone. A girl is body shammed if she wears something which is considered “too revealing” by the society but if this society is well-mannered then why do they see those revealed parts I mean there’s much more too see above her cleavage. Look at her face and try to know about her beautiful thoughts and not about her character it’s not affecting you in anyway. If a girl gets pregnant before marriage she’s disowned by her parents, society but that boy has no worries. After Hindu marriage ceremony there’s a way of testing if the girl is virgin and if she’s not, she’s thrown out of her house and sometimes she’s burnt alive. The interesting part is there’s no such system for boys because for a wife her husband is considered to be Lord, she can’t even dare to doubt him.

She is not looking for a knight she is looking for a sword but we won’t give it to her after all this world is ruled by the decision of the majorities and trust me they really care for Justin Bieber live concert. I salute Miss Laxmi Agarwal who wore a smile like loaded guns even though she went through the toughest journey. She didn’t cry when her eyes were stitched without giving her a pain killer. She didn’t hide herself in a dark room when her brother was suffering from tuberculosis. She stepped out in search of a job when her father died of heart attack and there was no earning member left in her family. She was insulted many times, people looked at her like she was an alien but she didn’t commit suicide. She fought and fought. Today, the whole world is reading about her. I thought my life is tough kudos to you girl. We should love ourselves so fiercely, that when others see us they know exactly how it should be done and when they can’t love us, can’t respect us, they’ve no rights to judge us and we don’t have to give them that right. Fight for your freedom and celebrate being you because women like you drown oceans.

The Times We Had..

There was a time when Grandpa used to wake me up before the sounds of Church bells but now when I look back I keep crawling on my bed all day. Maybe because life is not so interesting and as I’m an adult there’s nobody responsible for my irresponsibility.
Gone are the days when we used to go on a long morning walk and talk about almost every eye-catching objects that crossed our way but now even five minutes with someone force me to talk about this stressful life and maturity. It was the time when I used to believe that singing Rain Rain Go Away will really stop the rain and Santa Claus does exist. The time when Mom used to award me five rupees for completing my homework and I used to by ten “not so tasty” candies only because the quantity was more.

The times when festival meant desserts and new dresses.

The times when we didn’t know the uses of smartphones and met new friends offline.

The  times when life had everything to be curious about. 

The times when smiling was not a need it was a habit. 

Yes, those were the times we had…

I’m an adult now. No, wait! I’m an “adult girl”. I’m not allowed to play cricket with my younger brothers because​ the society finds it shameless. I can’t wear my trouser and go outside, they expect me to wear something classy as I’m an adult. I can’t demand something from my parents, I can’t even discuss my problems with them they will scold me for behaving like a kid. When I was two-three years old, I cried almost every minute and they calmed me down. They loved when I laughed for no reasons but now I’m an adult. 

I find silence beautiful though I miss that careless smile.

I find maturity classy though I find those stupidity funny.

I love being workaholic though I want to set myself free for a while….

The oddest thing is when we look back at something we thought we knew but find out the truth of it was completely different. After few years, we will see our ex-boyfriend getting married and having children..that would be painful, you know. Though we move on after years but somewhere it hurts..it really does and we fake a smile for the beautiful and complicated story life gave us. 

Fifty years later we will face the hardest part of life, old age. When we lose these memories, when we see our friends dying and wait for our turn. It’s true we enter dumb and we leave dumb the difference is just that when we came in this world we were curious about the colors and life but when we leave, we somewhere feel like…Oh my God! it amazed me..it really did! 😅

Sweven 


“Can I come closer to you? Aaaa..I mean very close so that I can hear your beat. I really  like that sound”, said Arth.
He wasn’t like other guys. He loved her and just her. Though she was completely different but he never tried to change her. He fought with her. He respected her, protected her, brought her closer and pushed her away but he never fell for someone else. They used to sleep on the beach late at night just to talk about life beneath the shimmering blue sky, their best nights happened since then. He didn’t know what was that feeling. Those misunderstandings weren’t enough for the love between them to cease. He was everyone’s crush, a perfect man but he loved only that imperfect girl. Holding her hand, he walked everywhere without bothering about her lower status than that of his. She came to him in pieces but he completed her and left no scars. She was his love story and he wrote about her into everything he did. He thrilled her by kissing just her forehead. His love was magic. He left everything just to be with her no matter what the circumstances were. He adored her, encouraged her. He craved fiery passion and she was a firecracker. He wanted her the way ocean wants shore, the way rain wants to fall and she just loved him too hard. They were perfect for each other and she was never afraid to lose him because she knew that he can’t be stolen. It was hard to find a love story like theirs in today’s world but they were born for each other.

The Sunshine Blogger Award

Whoa! Thank you Claudia for nominating me. It’s your beautiful heart that made my blogs so special. You’re not just an honest psychologist but also a very talented blogger, a self dependent woman who’s working really hard to make her daughters capable. You’re someone who is ever ready to complement people for their good works, someone who amazed me with beautiful posts. I really feel privileged that I got an opportunity to complement your soul. 

Readers can check her blog here- https://betweenthelines2017blog.wordpress.com

Here are the Sunshine Blogger Award Rules:

1.) Thank the person who nominated you in a blog post and link back to their blog.

2.) Answer the 11 questions sent by the person who nominated you.

3.) Nominate 11 other bloggers to receive the award and write them 11 new questions.

4.) List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo in your post and/or on your blog.

These are the questions asked by Claudia-

  1. What is your strongest quality?
  2. Three things you can’t live without?
  3. How old were you when you fell in love for the first time?
  4. Describe your safe place.
  5. What is your favorite season?
  6. Your favorite song?
  7. If you could change anything about you, what would you chose?
  8. A food you can’t stand is…
  9. A quote that defines you is…
  10. What is the quality you appreciate the most in people?
  11. Your favorite moment of day is… 

And Here are my answers-

  1.   I think my strongest quality is, I’m a very good advisor and I can help anyone to face their worst situations with ease. I’ve grown before time so I can deal with my emotional problems like a very strong girl.
  2. My family, my career and love. We humans are social animals. We can live without love for years but slowly it makes us stone and no one would want that day in life when we forget to smile. Love first comes from family and then from someone far away. No, I haven’t found him yet but I’m​ very sure that one day he’ll come and he’ll be as important as my family. Career is important because life has  a motive and our work is what defines us.
  3. I don’t know if that was love what made me a better person. It happened at the age of thirteen.
  4. I found a beautiful place but in another city during my school days. Covered with trees and blue shimmering sky, that was the most peaceful place away from the limelight of big cities. Another such place is my mom’s arms.. maybe it sounds too dramatic but yes, I feel secure here.
  5. Autumn…I don’t know how it can be so beautiful when everything is dying.
  6. ‘My heart will go on…’ by Celine Dione from the movie ‘Titanic’. It really touched my soul.
  7. I want myself to fall in love again without fear. Things have gone worst in the last few years that made me feel negative about love.
  8. Oily and sugary foods.
  9. “In spite of everything people are really good at heart”, by Anne Frank.
  10. Those who feel good about their existence, who don’t intend to hurt anyone’s feelings and who try to understand the situation before overreacting.
  11. These favorite moments never happened.

I’d like to nominate:–

  1. @aeshaporwal
  2. @davegoodlove
  3. @kinjalparekh98
  4. @danicapiche
  5. @janlego2014
  6. @urbanpoetry2017
  7. @saminamallick
  8. @smilingdreamerblog
  9. @rareity
  10. @shadowsinmidnight
  11. @onlysangbad

 Here are my questions-

1. What’s your philosophy in life?

2. What’s the one thing you would like to change about yourself?

3. Are you religious or spiritual?

4. Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert?

5. Which parent are you closer to and why?

6. What was the best phase in your life?

7. What was the worst phase in your life?

8. Is what you’re doing now what you always wanted to do growing up?

9. What makes you feel accomplished?

10. What’s your favorite book/movie of all time and why did it speak to you so much?

11. What is a relationship deal breaker for you?

Thanks for reading this guys…it was too long😅

Hunger

People say, “no one can be perfect” but they also say, “nothing is impossible”.

People like black dresses but they don’t like black faces. Oh well! they like Bravo and that’s because he’s bloody successful. Your color doesn’t matter, people can still see your inner beauty all you need is MONEY! Let that guy dump you today.

Maybe you’re not successful because your mom told you to be an engineer and you wanted to be a painter. Now that’s a bitter truth of life that your parents will die cursing you for being a failure after 40 years and you’ll blame them even after their death and I’m still not sure if that’s really your life.

The door to success is closer when you’re born rich than when you’re born poor but success doesn’t differentiate. Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam sold newspapers, Shahrukh Khan never had a blue tiara on his head and for sure, Abhishek Bachchan is Amitabh Bachchan’s son.

I can’t figure out if marks really does matter because Sundar Pichai is not an IIT topper and I’m still finding a successful man who got rank 1 in IIT entrance exam.

And if you can’t stand with it without regular motivation, remember you’re working to buy a better bed for the next time when you sleep.

Work that hard so that tomorrow if you forget to click a selfie, you can search millions of yours on Internet.

There are scars behind her wrinkles.

To all the mothers in this world who spent their life thinking about the future of their husbands and children.

Wait for few minutes and look back. You’ve given enough of your life. Your husband is earning and can manage his life even in the worst situation. Your children have learnt so much about life to live without depending on you.

Where will you go if he leaves you for another lovely lady?

Where will you go and wipe your tears because your little babies are too busy.

What will you eat because you’ve no ways to earn?

How will you face the mirror every morning with scars given by your own heart?

He was so weak that he wanted to prove his strength by crushing a woman and everytime you can’t prove it to your society because violence are not always physical. Divorcees are not respected in the society we live because you dare to fight for your self respect. You can’t marry again if you’re a widow because you may get a characterless​ tag. You’re suppressing yourself because of them and giving them power to suppress another. You don’t want to listen bad about you from the people in your society but you can bear those belts from your family. This is a place where if a girl is raped, people worry about her marriage but they don’t even think about her career. After divorce you can claim your husband’s property but why can’t you earn yourself and stop bowing before them. Invest in yourself first! do not tame the wolf inside you just because you are dominated by someone who himself is being ruled by drugs.

It’s time to be young again.

Go get a new hair color❤

Go Live❤